“Azerbaijan” the Absurd: An Introduction

“Azerbaijan” the Absurd: An Introduction

Fabricated History to Suit a Fabricated “Nation”

History is irrelevant to the Turks. No wonder, unlike primitive, nomadic Turkic tribes that never had a writing system throughout history, historians of all nations who lived or traveled in the lands west of the Caspian occupied by Turks today, have given horrifying accounts of the barbaric incursions of hordes of Mongolo-Tatar invaders into these cradles of human civilization.

Since these accounts do not work to the credit of the Turks who have put on a mask of modernity, they have resorted to distorting history, fabricating fairytales, erasing the symbols and inscriptions that would betray the Armenian origin of certain historic monuments in the name of restoration and destroying every piece of evidence that proves millennia old presence of the indigenous peoples of the lands they have usurped, especially the Armenians.

Being nothing but the extension of Turkey and counterfeited for pan-Turkist purposes and illegitimate land claims from Iran as it is apparent in its naming forgery, fake “Azerbaijan” has naturally followed the example of its progenitor in matters of historic falsification. It can be safely assumed that everything presented as fact by today’s “Azeri” “historians” is merely a 180 degrees twisting of the same.

Examples abound. Here a few totally ridiculous samples of distory “Azeri” style:

Abulfazl Elçibay in Bu manin taleyimdir, Baku, 1992, page 61: “Since hundreds of thousands of years, “Azeri” Turks lived in lands stretching from Hamadan to Darband and from Gokçe to the Caspian Sea.” It’s amazing though, that we do not have a single mention of a nation called “Azeri” before the end of 1930s anywhere in recorded history.

A. Demirchizadeh says that Herodotus was aware of the name of Atropatena (Greek for Atrpatakan/Azarbaijan). This is preposterous because Herodotus is known to have lived around 484-425 BC, more than a century before the fall of the Achaemenids by Alexander that led to the renaming of Lesser Media into Atrpatakan/Aturpatekan after Atropat, the Satrap who held on to the independence of his land.

F. Kirzioglu claims that the Sumerians lived in Turkistan 8000 years BC, under the name of Kurris and settled in Azarbaijan and “Eastern Anatolia” (A land that has never existed, H.) since 400 BC. Of course, he doesn’t feel the need to explain whether he saw this in a dream, he was “divinely” inspired or had access to a source unknown to mankind until now. He has nothing to say about the fact that if Sumerians (who are known, among other things, to have invented writing five thousand years ago) were Turks, how come Turks who invented writing were such uncivilized savages four thousand years after these inventions.

A gem excelling in fabrications and distortion of history is the book History of “Azerbaijan””, compiled by the “Academy of Sciences of the Soviet Republic of “Azerbaijan”” published in Baku in 1958. The real Azarbaijan (Atrpatakan) has been presented (oh wonder!) as part of Albania (Aghvank) and the fallacious terms of “North Azerbaijan” and “South Azerbaijan” rule the falsification of the “scholarly” delusions. Their goal is the final “reunification” of the two that have been “divided” as a result of historical events they haven’t been able to elucidate despite their futile garbage production.

Written in Soviet times and considering the Soviet-Turkey relations of the Cold War era, the “work” cannot be as pro Turkish as the authors would have wished. In any case and no matter how hard they have pushed the limits of their twisted imagination, the “book” contains contradictions that betray the absurdity of the claims:

Their pretension that Aghvank and Azarbaijan were one and the same land is shattered when they speak of the language of the two: “The Seljuk occupation was accompanied by the influx of large numbers of Turkic migrants. This led to the domination of their language over that of the subjugated ethnicities (page 140)… The original languages of these countries (emphasis is mine H.) were Azari and Arani that resisted the invaders for some time (page 169)… The waves of the Turkish invasions in the 13th century AD drove the Azari, Arani and other languages into a corner and dominated the region (page 171).” This proves that: A. the languages of Aghvank and Azarbaijan weren’t the same, B. neither the languages nor the peoples of these regions had anything to do with Turks and C. while Azarbaijan (the real) was not a country, the slip of the pen confirms that Aghvank and Azarbaijan (Atrpatakan) were two distinct entities.

While throughout the twenty two centuries before the artificial insemination in 1918, between the Ottomans as the male progenitor and the Bolsheviks as the surrogate mother, of fake “Azerbaijan” no one ever doubted the origin of the term Atrpatakan, named after Atropat who held on to the independence of the Lesser Media after the fall of the Achaemenid empire in times of Alexander’s invasion of Persia, this has not prevented the “Azeri” “scholars” from dreaming surrealistic concoctions to somehow relate this purely Iranian/Indo-European term to Turkish.

M.Seidov (“PhD” Linguistic Sciences (!)) steals the crown of Turkish distorians and his hallucinatory inventions can no doubt be catapulted to the apex of absurdity. He spews: ““Az” which is the prefix of the name “Azerbaijan” is a Turkish name of a certain Turkic tribe. “er” that follows means “man”; the word “bai” is also Turkish and is the same as the Turkish word “beg”. Finally, “ajan” is a Turkish word meaning khan or father. Thus “Azerbaijan” means khan, beg and a man from the tribe Az”. Lord, have mercy! Where do they get the power for this sort of unfounded puke generation? In Persian, the cry of a donkey is rendered by the onomatopoeic term “ar-ar”. Seidov’s defecation sounds quite like the braying of an ass: Ar-ar-bray-ajan.

Fortunately there is a grain of integrity even among “Azeri” scholars like Igrar Aliev who admits: “It can be confirmed with absolute certainty that there is no Turkish origin for the name Azerbaijan” (Aliev Igrar, Ocherk istorii Atropateni, Baku, 1989, p34.)